To help me sleep at night…

I’m sure everyone can relate to the “Why does my brain have to think of EVERYTHING when I’m trying to go to sleep?!” dilemma.
For me, writing is a way to vent and to get things off my chest/out of my head. It helps me sleep at night. I’ve had a few things on my mind lately so here I go:

Um, Peanut is growing way too fast. He will be four months old on Thursday and that just blows my mind. I remember with great clarity the morning we found out we were pregnant, the day we told our families, our first pregnancy appointment, the gender reveal appointment, both baby showers (surprise baby shower), the day I went into labor and delivery, and the day we brought him home. Somehow it all feels like yesterday. Like all of those events happened on the same day, and that day was yesterday. How?

I’ve been thinking about this blog a lot. I think about what I wanted this blog to be when I first started it and what it’s really become. I used to want this blog to be where I shared my creative ideas and mishaps, where I shared recipes I’ve tried. I wanted this blog to be big and fabulous like The Pioneer Woman so I could work from home (ha). I would love to work from home now more than ever. I would love to be able to stay home with my little guy. What this blog has turned into is more a “lifestyle” blog where whoever is reading gets a little bit of everything, and I love that. I do write to share about my creative ideas and recipes, but I also write just to write. In some ways it’s my own personal, online diary. My “dear diary” posts are more for me than they are for anyone else. I ALWAYS go back and read through my own blog posts. I really think that the way I type is the way I talk. I can hear myself saying the things I’m writing about. But maybe that’s because I AM the one writing them? Anyway, I like the direction of my blog and although I would LOVE to have more followers (and hopefully be able to work from home one day), if my blog didn’t grow (follower wise) any bigger than it is right now, I honestly believe I would still keep going with this blog.

I wish I had known then what I know now about blogging. I kind of just started it on a whim, no fanciness or any ideas of how to make it appealing. Right now my blog isn’t “self hosted” so there’s not a whole lot of personalizing I can do design wise. I do hope to one day make this a self hosted blog, but for now what I have is great.

Hubs and I have been talking about whether or not we want to move or stay. We would stay within the town we currently live in (hopefully), but move to a (hopefully) bigger place. I have mixed feelings. And they’re legit mixed feelings, which makes making a decision really hard. First of all, I LOVE our current house. It’s definitely a “first house” and not a “forever home”, but I love it. It’s about 14 years old with appliances to match. It also doesn’t have a garage which is something Hubs and I really want. It’s perfect “size wise” with just the three of us, but I could totally see it being too small if we decide to have another child. (Which wouldn’t be for a couple of years.) There are things that definitely need to be done to the house that we don’t have the finances to do. The most important things are functionality issues (not cosmetic) so that makes it seem a bit more severe. Especially with having a baby in the house. In the four years that we’ve been in our town, major things have happened which have made our home property value sky rocket, which is what makes selling so tempting. Where I get caught up is absolutely wanting to stay in our town. (Our home property values went up, but so did everyone elses which makes wanting to stay in the same price range as we were in three years ago tough.) If we did find a house in the price range that we are wanting, it would most likely be a home with the same “problems”, BUT we would have the money to update those things with (hopefully) the profit of what we make for selling our house. I guess it’s just tough because if we had the finances to update what needs updating, there’s no doubt in my mind that we would stay where we are. But since we don’t, selling/moving is tempting.

Okay, that’s out. Maybe I’ll be able to sleep tonight.